Showing posts with label Introspection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Introspection. Show all posts

Thursday, April 16, 2009

FEAR AND BRAVERY

A conversation with a person whose profession involves a daily display of great courage prompted this post. The point of conversation was “what makes a man or woman continue with an action or perform one in the full knowledge of its risks”? Bravery in most dictionaries would be defined “an act of fearlessness in the light of obvious danger”.

In the real sense bravery is a lot more complicated than this simple explanation. For one, bravery would not so much be fearlessness, than the “mastery of fear”, or a disciplined dealing with that fear. I doubt there would be any man or woman who would not feel fear in a dangerous situation. These are different types of situations. Those of immediate and sudden danger (like coming face to face with a large cobra) where it’s mostly a rush of adrenaline that prompts a reaction, than a thought-out counter attack. And those of prolonged danger like wars and battles. In the first case, one doesn’t necessarily have been of great courage to protect oneself. But in the second, the imminent danger grows upon you. It would require great resolution and strong spirit to continue, and jump into the line of fire knowing very well the risks of the undertaking.


Bravery has been described by the psycho analyst Schleps as “a disposition to voluntarily act, perhaps fearfully, in a dangerous circumstance, where there are considerable risks, in an effort to obtain some perceived good to oneself or a community, knowing that the desired good may not be realized.”
This definition brings forward many interesting angles:
A) The action must be voluntary, not coerced.
B) Bravery must involved judgment, a full understanding and acceptance of risk and consequences.
C) Bravery requires a presence of danger, risk, potential injury, loss. With out a sense of these, there is no bravery in the act.
D) Bravery is more a mastery of fear, than fearlessness.


I think it’s an insult to call a man “fearless”. Its equivalent to being called “brainless”. People distinguish between courageous and foolhardy action. Thoughtful courage is a quality practiced by very few, while “rashness and boldness”, fearlessness without forethought is very common. Let’s just say there is a thin line between courage and foolishness. It is prudence which provides the wisdom to assess a potential danger and worthy of bravery or not. Action towards a worthy end would be considered more courageous than simply a risky action. For example, trying to take on a gang of rogues all alone, without back-up, and getting your bones broken, over an ego-issue would be foolhardy. Better pick your battles and be called a coward. The sign of a truly brave soldier is to fight the right wars, and walk away from worthless squabbles.


Actually fear and bravery complete each other…there is none without the other. Fear has to be overcome to be brave. Conquering fear of bodily injury or physical pain is the most classic form of bravery, as bravery in a battlefield....…Bravery is usually considered doing what is right; therefore it takes a moral tone. We would be reluctant to consider a murderer a brave person, though he might have taken great risks to commit his crime.


Endurance, a form of moral bravery, entailing a patient suffering over a long period of time can be described as the primary form of bravery. Moral bravery compels a person to do what he/she thinks is right, despite fear of social economic consequences.


People in small units or strong social groups who witness each others' valorous action may feel inspired to act courageously themselves, as in an army platoon. The cohesive unit further supports bravery. Those engaged in dangerous tasks like bomb-disposal squads are usually a very well-adjusted group among themselves. So are sects and tribes, like the Masai-tribe of Africa, known for their brave warriors.


It’s interesting to note how the concept of true bravery changes with years. People come to conceptualize bravery differently as they mature. Very young children perceive physical acts as braver than psychological ones. Adolescents have a more complex psychology, and understand social risks regarding various acts of bravery. Younger people are more prone to commit adventurous or thrilling acts of bravery, while older people are more likely to engage in moral acts of bravery.

What do you feel bravery is to you?

Thursday, October 23, 2008

A QUOTABLE QUOTE

The only dream worth having is to dream that you will live while you're alive and die only when you're dead. Which means, to love. To be loved. To never forget your insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To persue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, To watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never to forget.

By John Berger.

Profound.

I stopped breathing for a while. Closed my eyes. I wanted to fully feel this feeling. Its the feeling akin to the one we get when we wash earth of our feet and nestle into our cosy bed. I could'nt help going over them again and again. Each time they made more sense, and each read-over made every doubt about it disappear. My hands and knees went slack and I experienced tranquility like never before. But then never before has the search for spirituality and peace been as desperate as it is in our times. These are desperate times. Mad hours. And I'm mad. Questions drive me insane sometimes. The answers are also questions in themselves. I furiously envy people who are religious, and who have the patience and discipline to follow an early morning cleaning and praying ritual. At least they know where to search for answers. Those days when I openly mocked God-lovers of the "Hindu-temple" variety are long gone. Now I yearn for their devoted fervour. I fancy I have my own relationship with God, but so far it had been a medley of mud-slinging, slew of complaints, maybe a pinch of 'thank you's'. Only now its dawning upon me that I'm actually one of the Blessed Ones, as I watch people's lives falling into a rubble of discontentment and disappointment around me. Pity it takes tragedy to count your blessings.

Anyway, the most bizarre thing, as I mulled over those words, was that I realized I happen to be a stark anti-thesis of whatever is being said here. I try to live a life which is a juxtaposition of rich flavours, but I am aware I'm almost humourously lackng in many ways. I'm fortunate enough to have people to love in my world, but usually I love them as convenient in my scheme of activity. They love me, yeah that for sure. In my sphere, I'm the most significant person, I could'nt care so much about the vulgarity or disparity as long as I can save myself from it. Leave alone seeking joy in it, I don't even like to be in a sad place in the first place. No, not at all. I do persue beauty, it tantalizes me, but its got to have a really good case to hold my attention-span. I, without fail, simplify what is complicated and complicate what's simple. I challenge strength and power. Believe me when I declare, trouble loves me!

Only now, as I'm getting older, I've started watching. I make an effort to understand. Only now, I've just about stopped tossing my head in the air with arrogance and looking away sullenly when I don't like the general turn of events. Only now, its dawning upon me that the object of life is sensation in its purest form and to grasp that form we require a lucid understanding of the inside and the outside. By "inside" I mean our mind, our thoughts, actions generating from these thoughts, and the consequences of these actions on the Universe. By "outside" I mean the Universe, the vast beyond, the orbits, the environment, the elements, the energies of our world, their concurrence and its result on our minds.
Only now, I understand how small and insignificant you and I are in the Grand scheme of events. we are all mere weightless dust particles floating in the air, with only our egos to provide buoyancy.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Hello, Again....Hello...

Hmm, my long absence was beginning to get to me! I hate these unavoidable breaks, it’s been months since my last post. Life’s been twirling’ us on its toes….a shift of place, shaping-up my new home, getting the feel of this new town, its people, going over the entire process of forgetting old mates, making new friends and fitting in……the damn heat is intolerable, even inspiration has been evading me!
Finally, it’s good to be bloggin’ again.

I found my baby-girl howling when I reached her play-school to pick her up today. Oh, let me say one thing about my little two and a half year old bundle of joy – she is the ultimate drama-queen! And she believes howling and creating cacophony is the best, fastest and easiest method of getting your way. Sympathies reached out to the poor, harassed teacher. She was trying hard to console my little brat, who was obviously getting a kick out of the fuss!!
Well, the reason of the outburst was that I was out wrapping-up chores and was about fifteen-minutes late in getting to school, so she was the only kid left in the class.
Sanjana comes running up to me and sobs in utter consternation (these tots today are very well-equipped in expressions), “ mommy, all my friends have gone !”

I couldn’t help but ruefully smile at her distress. I wanted to tell her, “ all of mommy’s friends have gone too !” Woe! Such is life !! So simple the world is for sanjana - mamma, papa, friends……..how complicated it is for us.

I remember the time when we were children and it was so easy to make friends. How innocently trivial the qualifications were, how differently we gauged people. Hell, who gauged??? Just spill your name n get playin’, that’s all!! And how awesome those friends were, we related on such basic terms.

I find it gets loopy as we grow older. It’s hard to make friends without selfish reasons. We’re friendly with our neighbor because we might need help suddenly sometime. We’re friendly at work simply because its easer to be part of a gang. We have shopping-buddies, pool-buddies, squash-buddies, kitty-friends……we guard our secrets, we watch our words, we speak politely, we behave pristinely. Where are those friends we used to be maniacs with, fought with, shared our joys, sorrows, fears, crushes, everything!! Those days without guile, without malice, without ulterior motives…and those buds that lived those years with me…..how I miss them all! like happy shadows they sailed with me, my friends they were…..

Neil Diamond must’ve felt like me when he sang, “ shadow, when I was young, I used to call your name, when no one else would come, shadow u always came
Even today my deepest bond is with pals from childhood. Like me, even they’re caught-up in adulthood, eking-out in this mad, mad world. I’ve made many friends since them, but over the years, its become a mechanical process more than bonding. Faces, names come to my mind as I write this, people swim across from the sea of memories in my head. People come, they go, reality dwindles, and ghosts become reality. Things change and we change with things, but some things never do. Friendships from our obliviously gleeful childhood remain just that…static in time, like clippings from an old movie.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

ASPIRATION

In each of our hearts there lie some dreams that we just let be. Every now and then we go back to them to enjoy their innocent magic, and smile at their untouched beauty. These lines are dedicated to the things that we choose to leave undone…..we leave them for some other time and place.....

Oh! Aspiration, every now and then
U creep in besides me
U’re potent ecstasy, u grow upon me
I gaze awhile at your fervid smile
U’re so close, yet too far away from me
Your distant fire I so admire
Your whispers are breathlessYou tease my burdened desire
U embrace me your gentle touch I require

U’re a burning, and a fever
U would cling to me forever

When I was restless, you were young
Every yearning together we had sung
Our stolen time, with lyre and rhyme
Should my heart feel to be a crime

I remember our 'everytime'.......
Kiss the first time for the last time
I glance in your eyes
The same look must be in mine
We agree, another place another time
Yes, alas! Another place another time!

U feel my laugh, I feel your sorrow
We look away, we await tomorrow
And though my faith is shaken
And your heart is broken
Oh! Aspiration
U’re the magic of mystery to me
Joy to my heart, dear to my soul u shall be

Thank heavens! My crisis is past
Your lingering freshness is over at last
For, of all tortures, this torture is the worst
Of wanting of water that quenches all thirst
Now like an opium-addict at bay
I return to mundane jobs of the day
Until u sail again in my reverie
Continuing- as dreams have been to me
Oh ! aspiration
A chaos of vivid color- I dream of u eternally.........
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